Inside Man Quotations

Dalton Russell

My name is Dalton Russell. Pay strict attention to what I say because I choose my words carefully and never repeat myself. I have told you my name, and that's the who. The where can most readily be described as a prison cell. But there's a vast difference between being stuck in a tiny cell and being imprisoned. The what is easy. Recently, I planned and set in motion events to execute the perfect bank robbery. That's also the when. As for the why, beyond the obvious financial motivation, it's exceedingly simple. Because I can. Which leaves us only with the how. And therein, as the Bard would tell us, lies the rub.
When I said that I planned the perfect bank robbery, I meant precisely that.
You have four seconds. Anyone still standing gets shot.
My friends and I are making a very large withdrawal from this bank. Anybody gets in our way, gets a bullet in the brain.
Peter, think very carefully about how you answer the next question, because if you get it wrong, your headstone will read: "Here lies Peter Hammond, hero who valiantly attempted to prevent a brilliant bank robbery by trying to hide his cellular phone, but wound up getting shot in the fucking head."
Anyone else here smarter than me?
Respect is the ultimate currency.
Or am I just whistling "Dixie" out of my ass?
When I'm good and ready, I'm gonna walk right through the front door.
Fact is, all lies, all evil deeds, they stink. You can cover them up for a while, but they don't go away.

Det. Keith Frazier

We got to sit back and look at this thing from a distance. Things are not all they appear to be.
Until I talk to them, they get nothing, not even a cup of coffee.
You planned every inch of this thing right from the start and you've got everybody marching to your beat, including me, and I'm through buying it.
This ain't no bank robbery.
Don't bullshit the bullshitter!
Look out, bad guys! Here I come.
Detective first grade Keith Fraz-ahhh.
Sorry to interrupt you, Mister Mayor, but there's an old American saying: When there's blood on the streets, somebody's gotta go to jail.
Thank you, bank robber!

Madeleine White

I can change your entire program, so the sooner that you stop being my problem, and start being my solution, the better off you'll be.
We're listing you as a reference.

Other Characters

Young Boy: Like my man Fiddy says, get rich or die trying.
Veronica Keepsake: You're saying I violated section 34/Double-D?
Vikram Walia: Protect and serve my ass, where's my fucking turban?

Dialogue

Dalton Russell: Don't I sound calm to you?

Det. Keith Frazier: Yes, you do.

Det. Keith Frazier: I wouldn't get too comfortable here.

Dalton Russell: I have the cable guy coming on Wednesday.

Det. Bill Mitchell: Hey Keith, let me see your shoe.

Det. Keith Frazier: What?

Det. Bill Mitchell: Lemme see your shoe.

Det. Keith Frazier: Why?

Det. Bill Mitchell: 'Cause I have never seen anyone put their foot that far up a guy's ass.

Det. Keith Frazier: [Busts out laughing] Yeah, I guess I did, didn't I?

Dalton Russell: Soon I'm gonna be sucking down Piña Coladas in a hot tub with six girls named Amber and Tiffany.

Det. Keith Frazier: No, it's more like in the shower with two guys named Jamal and Jesus...and here's the bad news; that thing you're sucking on? [in a sing-songy voice] It's not a Piña Colada!

Madeleine White: Look, detective, there are matters at stake here that are a little bit above your pay grade.

Det. Keith Frazier: Why don't you just tell the mayor to raise my pay grade to the right level? Problem solved.

Det. Keith Frazier: You ever had a gun stuck in your face before?

Sergeant Collins: Yeah, once.

Det. Keith Frazier: Really?

Sergeant Collins: Yeah, by a twelve-year-old.

Det. Keith Frazier: What was that like?

Sergeant Collins: Not one of my better days.

Dalton Russell: Lady? Believe me. This is the only situation where I'd ask you to do this. But take off your fucking clothes.

Miriam: No. You should be ashamed of yourself. [Dalton points gun at her head] What's with you mishegoyim? Go ahead, make my day.

Dalton Russell: Take your fucking clothes off, lady.

Miriam: No!

Vikram Walia: Fuckin' tired of this shit. What happened to my fuckin' civil rights? Why can't I go anywhere without being harassed? Get thrown out a bank, I'm a hostage, I get harassed. I go to the airport, I can't go through security without a random selection. Fuckin' random, my ass.

Det. Keith Frazier: I bet you can get a cab though.

Vikram Walia: I guess that's one of the perks.

Herman Gluck: He said stay away! Stay away or he'll toss out two dead bodies!

Cop: Who said this? Who?

Herman Gluck: Who? Who? I don't know who! The one with the big fucking gun, that's who!

Quoternity