Rugrats

• Susie:Where's my room waaaaaahhhh!!!!!!!(cries like a baby)
• "A baby's gotta do what a baby's gotta do." -Tommy Pickles
• "Chuckie....................................eats a scallion." -Chuckie Finster
• "When life hands you a lemon, make applesauce!" - Angelica
• "You dumb babies" - Angelica
• "Being bad means never having to say you're sorry." - Angelica, lampooning a line from the 1970 movie Love Story
• "Mommy's ears are not a toy, Tommy." - Didi
• "Do we want to be remembered as the family that settled for less?" - Stu
• Angelica: Do you swear to tell Ruth, the whole Ruth, and nothing but Ruth, so help you Bob? ...Just say you do.
  Phil & Lil: You do.
• "Tommy's not old enough for that gizmo; heck, I'm not even old enough for it!" - Grandpa
• "Here you go, boy. Burnt to a crisp, just like you like them." - Stu, giving a burnt burger to Spike
• "I'm so hungry, I could eat a hog, head first!" - Mr. Mucklehoney
• "Land Without Brains is more like it!" - Grandpa, watching the movie The Land Without Smiles
• Shawna (on film): Just make sure you give valentines to the other needy children, Squeaky Bear. It's too late for me.
  Grandpa: It's too late for me, too.
  Didi: Shh!
  Grandpa: I'm gonna get some candy; I'd rather rot my teeth than sit here and rot my brain.
• "Take a nap and keep us both out of trouble." - Grandpa, to Tommy
• Mail Boy: Natalie, would you like to go on a date with me tomorrow night?
  Natalie: Not for all the gold in China.
  Mail Boy: How about a couple of chili dogs, 2 Cokes, and a box of Raisinets?
  Natalie: What time will you pick me up?
• Angelica: After all, I'm playing the most dangerous game of all!
  Chuckie: Musical Chairs?
  Angelica: No, dummy! Love!
• Tommy: I'll trade you [one of your milk bottles] my stacking cups.
  Phil: There's a couple of them missing.
  Tommy: My snowman book?
  Lil: We read it already.
  Tommy: My fire truck?
  Lil: Umm... We're s'posed to be getting one for our birthday.
• "Looks lifelike. Even smells lifelike. If I didn't know better, I say it was Tommy." - Grandpa, upon discovering the "doll" that came in the mail, not realizing that Stu already has the doll and Tommy is in the box
• "In my day we did all our counting with our fingers, and for bigger numbers we used our toes!" - Grandpa
• Didi: After kickoff, all you boys'll be thinking about is guzzling soda and eating pork rinds!
  Stu: Whoa! Time out! I haven't eaten pork rinds in years!
• Grandpa: Back in Minnesota State I was the "Galloping", uh... "Galloping"...
  Drew: Geezer?
• Angelica: See these teddy bears? They're the jerky.
  Phil, Lil, & Chuckie: The jury?
  Angelica: Not the Jury! The jerky!
• "'Made In Taiwan.' Hmm, I didn't know Taiwan was in France!" - Grandpa
• Stu: My disco outfit!
  Didi: Stu, you haven't worn that thing since 1977!
  Stu: Hey, disco is coming back!
  Angelica: Aunt Didi, what's disco?
  Didi: Oh, nothing, sweetheart; it's something that happened a long time ago and is never, ever coming back, so don't you worry.
• "Once upon a time, there was a very lonely bunny who needed some friends, and found some friends, and everyone was happy. The end." - Grandpa, rushing to get Tommy & Chuckie into bed before Morgana shows up
• "Hey look!
  There's kids!
  On the ice!
  What's a dinosaur to do
  When there's kids on the ice!
  Someone better call their moms!" - Reptar (on Ice), ad-libbing when the Rugrats wander onto the ice
• Howard: Who do you think I am? An imbecile?
  Stu: Wow, Howard! And it only took you 15 seconds!
• Chazz: Sometimes it takes a more mature person to stop a fight than one who started it to begin with.
  Stu: Right, Chazz. Why don't you go home and watch more of those Mr. Rogers reruns?
• "You? A superhero? You just looked like you fell into a laundry basket!" - Angelica
• "It's nice to make new friends, even if you knew them for 76 years." - Grandpa
• Stu: The bald guy gave [the action-musical movie The Merminator] "thumbs up".
  Grandpa: I bet the fat guy hated it!
• "Yes, yes. All goes accordion to plan, we'll go inside Chuckie, all right. But little do those babies know that I'm not gonna get rid of that [watermelon] seed; I'm gonna make it grow!" - Angelica
• "Thanks to those rugrats, I am completely revising my theories. The old "Dr. Lipschitz" is now merely an historical footnote; from now on, I'm now going to base my work on the French method of childrearing." - Dr. Lipschitz
• Stu: Charlotte, it's so nice that you can finally get away from work and spend the holidays with us.
  Charlotte: Well, it is Christmas; after all, it's the season of love & joy. (back to Jonathan on the phone) I don't care, Jonathan! We got to crush the competition and we got to crush them now!
• Angelica: You don't know the first thing about magic! (walks away)
  Chuckie: Tommy, what's the first thing about magic?
  Tommy: I don't know, Chuckie.
  Phil: Hmm. Guess Angelica was right!
• "It all started when the first present was given by the Pilgrims a long time ago. Then everybody started giving presents; even the Easter Bunny started giving them until Santa slapped him with a lawsuit." - Angelica, explaining the history of Christmas to Phil & Lil
• Randy: Say, Luce, remember the realtor told us about that ancient Indian curse? You don't think he (Stu) is it, do you?
• "You dumb babies! Stop having fun! It's just a dumb old box!" - Angelica, after the babies continue to play with the box she just tore up
• Chaz: I still can't believe Didi's baby brother is getting married. I mean, it seems like only yesterday he was running around in short pants screaming.
  Stu: That was only yesterday, Chaz. Remember the bachelor party?
• "I have to go, Jonathan; I'm at a friend's merger, er, wedding." - Charlotte
• Angelica: (giving the babies orders via her toy cellphone, which she has planted in Spike's mouth) Do you always do what your mommy tells you?
  Tommy: Yes.
  Angelica: Well, cut it out!
• "You can't punish me; I'm Angelica! Your princess! Your cupcake! Your little tax shelter!" - Angelica, being punished for ruining Drew's office
• Boris: Why don't you turn on the Sesame Seed for them to watch?
  Minka: What am I, your servant girl? Why don't you turn on the Sesame Seed?
  Boris: I can't. I'm too old.
  Minka: I'm old too.
  Boris: But I'm older.
  Minka: By 2 weeks!
  Boris: It was a leap year!
  Minka: Leap year, schmeap year! Now go turn on the Seed!
• "All I need is a 'Thank You', and... oh, yeah, for you to be my slave for the rest of your life." - Angelica, after saving Chuckie's life
• "Tooth fairy? What a joke! Cheat fairy's more like her!" - Angelica, after only getting a dime for one of her teeth
• Angelica: Could [a magic lamp] turn Fluffy into a flying horse?
  Grandpa: It could turn Fluffy into a Ferarri!
• "Aladdin rubbed the magic lamp and wished for a Kingfisher 9000 Speed Boat." - Grandpa
• "Aladdin rubbed the lamp so he could turn rocks into gold, so he could buy a Kingfisher 9000." - Grandpa, when the Rugrats didn't believe the last line
• Chuckie: [after Finding Chazz buried in the sand on the beach with only his head visible] AAAAAAAH! MY DAD'S BEEN DECAFINATED!
• "That was the final nail in the coffee!" - Susie, thinking Angelica has stole her tricycle
• (After the babies trick Angelica into thinking she has the fictional ailment Rhinoceritis) Drew: Angelica, why are you eating grass?
  Angelica: Be careful, daddy; a rhinoceros is known to charge at random.
• "Some people call him 'Bigfoot'; some call him 'Sasquatch', the rest just call him 'Sir'." - Grandpa
• Tommy: I call [my building blocks artwork] "3 Babies and a Guitar".
  Angelica: Do you know what I call it? (kicks blocks) A mess!
• "If hippos were meant to fly, they wouldn't weigh 3000 pounds." - Didi
• "It's our right to watch cartoons! Not my mom! Not my dad! Not even President Weisenheimer's gonna stop us!" - Young Stu, in a flashback in which he and Drew try to watch Blocky and Oxwinkle even after being punished
• "Another boring day at the Finster house. I can't believe I'm spending the best days of my life here!" - Angelica
• "Let me know if you want me to break anymore of your best friend's toys. See ya!" - Angelica
• Angelica: Home movies are movies that other people don't want to watch.
  Tommy: But why do they watch home movies?
  Angelica: They have to; it's the law.
• Grandpa: Stu! Didi! Great news! They're bringing back The Masked Detective!
  Stu: Great! Where was he?
• Chuckie: I saw this movie, King Krong, where he was pushed off the Entire State Building.
  Tommy: So?
  Chuckie: So why don't we push Mr. Friend off the Entire State Building? Never mind. I don't know why I even try.
• Angelica: What kind of bozo would not put the key in the package?
  Chuckie: Bozo works at the handcuff factory?
  Angelica: Do me a favor; just keep quiet for awhile?
• "The police car's at the fire station; the fire truck's at the airport; the airplane's on top of the restaurant; people are hanging out of windows and doors, buildings have moved, and you've completely taken apart City Hall!" - Chuckie, after Tommy "rearranges" his Bogo Blocks toy village
• "I don't know what kind of baby colony you're running, Deed, but it's time to face facts! The sixties are over and we lost, so get with the program, alright?" - Betty, after Phil & Lil discard their clothes in Tommy's house
• "Chuckie's a stupid name. Blaine's a TV name. Everyone knows TV names are better." - Angelica
• Charlotte: Now what do we do the next time we want something?
  Angelica: Ask Daddy ?* Lil: (after Chuckie describes having a dream involving the Rugrats in a weird wonderland, a talking Spike, and Tommy with a clown face) I wish Tommy was a clown, then we can feed him peanuts!
  Phil: That's elephants, Lillian.
• "Ooh, you babies are so incontinent!" - Angelica, when Phil & Lil keep disobeying her orders
• (Grandpa's black hair dye gives him red hair after being exposed to the sun) Grandpa: Serves me right to fool Mother Nature.
  Didi: And to order stuff from daytime TV.
• "Chanukah is the special time of year between Christmas and Misgiving when all the bestest holiday shows are on TV." - Angelica
• Dotted-Line Girl (Lil): I'm just a dotted line!
  Angelitron (Angelica): Any idiot can see a dotted line!
• Josh: We'll split the babies, 50/50.
  Angelica: Who gets the heads?
• "Rivers overflowed, mountains crumbled, and all the TV shows were cancelled." - Angelica, explaining to the babies what happened "the last time the world ended"
• Angelica: (going off to look for the cookies) I'll be right back; I'm gonna check on the babies.
  Tommy: Okay.
  Chuckie: What did Angelica say?
  Tommy: She says that she's going to check on the babies.
  Chuckie: Oh.
  All: (realizing) We are the babies!
• Grandpa: I won 15 jackpots in a row [last time I was in Las Vegas]; they flew me home first class just to get rid of me!
  Drew: I thought mom said you lost everything but your underwear and went home by bus?
  Grandpa: Oh, what does she know?
• Phil: I want a cheeseburger.
  Lil: Yeah! With chocolate!
  Angelica: You'll eat what I give you and like it! You have a choice of barbecubed yucky carrots or barbecubed yucky peas.
  Rugrats: Yuck!
  Angelica: (to Tommy) So what it'll be, Baldy?
  Tommy: I can't decide.
  Angelica: Why? Because it sounds so good?
  Tommy: No; because your barbecube is gone!
• "Deed, she's so beautiful. She's... she's a boy!" - Stu, on Dil's birth
• Didi: Chuckie? What happened to your shirt?
  Grandpa: If he's hungry as I am, he probably ate it!
• "Back in the old country, we didn't have wheelbarrows to move the wood. You had to chop down a tree and hope it fell in your living room!" - Boris
• "'Chicken Pops' is what turns little kids into chickens. That's why Chuckie has to stay inside. If the grownups let Chuckie outside, he'd get eaten by a cat!" - Angelica
• Minka: So Little Red Riding Hood skipped through the forest--
  Boris: It's Little Blue Riding Hood, Minka, not red!
  Minka: Boris, is the story 'Little Blue Riding Hood'? No! It's 'Little Red Riding Hood'! Anyway, so Little Red Riding Hood meets a wolf in the forest...
  Boris: It was a goat! In the desert!
  Minka: Wolf!
  Boris: Goat!
  Minka: Wolf!
  Boris: Desert!
  Minka: Forest!
  Chuckie: I like when your gramma and grampa tell stories, Tommy!
  Tommy: Yeah, we always get two stories instead of one!
• "Juggling is like playing catch, only by yourself." - Angelica
• "Wow! That's one bodacious load!" - A student in Didi's class after seeing Tommy's dirty diaper
• "You? A superhero? You just looked like you fell into a laundry basket!" - Angelica to Chuckie
• "I got diaper rash down to my knees." - Phil
• "Sometimes I wish I could be you, just so I can be friends with me!" - Angelica
• "Back in my day, I used to work as a carny; I worked day and night and slept with the elephants. If one of them had a bad dream, they'd roll over and squash ya!" - Grandpa
• Didi: I hope Grandpa comes back with anything other than 40 boxes of Fudgy Dingaling Bars.
  Stu: I hope they come back.
• "Your room is a potty?" - Tommy
• "No, snookums; toilet paper is for cleaning messes, not making them." - Didi
• "Baked apples! I hate stinky baked apples!" - Angelica
• "My mouth's so dry I can't even spit!" - Tommy
• "I got up, but my legs feel like Jello; the red kind, not the green kind with bananas that I like." - Tommy, as the Masked Detective's narration
• "Jail is like a bazillion times more horribler than Time Out!" - Angelica
• "Next to me, you're the cutest girl in the show!" - Angelica, to "Tonya" (Tommy in a dress)
• "See? That's the Weatherman. He's the guy who makes it hot or cold outside!" - Tommy
• "No! I knew Spike! Spike's my friend, and let me tell you something, that dog's no Spike!" - Tommy
• "YOU LITTLE BABIES ARE FIRED!" - Angelica
• "Boy! How come kittypillars work so hard to end up so ugly?" - Phil
• Minka: "Boris! Vere are the dumplings?"
  Boris: "I put zem in the refrigerator."
  Minka: "Not those dumplings!"
• "Thorg Hungry! Thorg Want Eat!" - Thorg the toy Gorilla
• [Tommy and Chuckie think they are grown-ups]
  Chuckie: Coffee, Tommy?
  Tommy: Sure, I'd love a cup of jobe.
• [Thinking that they wished Dil away]
  Tommy: But... but... people just don't disappear because you wish for them to.
  Phil: Yeah, Angelica- you're still here.
• Friends til the end! - Tommy

External link

• Rugrats random quote generator at Klasky-Csupo