The Spirit of Truth Quotations

The Spirit of Truth is the name of a Los Angeles-based televangelism program. Video of the program was uploaded to YouTube in 2006, and the televangelist's erratic behavior (including his frequent swearing) led to him becoming an internet phenomenon.

"It's my world, and every mothafuckin thing in it; that's including your asshole too."
"You believe in god like it's somethin you just wiped your ass with?"
"I come in the name of Jesus -- repeat it after me, bitch! -- I come in the name of Jesus by the power of the Holy Spirit."
"Are you laughin', biotch? Ha!"
"You can't hang wit me, bitch!"
"Stupid-ass house nigga!"
(To a caller who says tells the reverend that he isn't God) "But, I *AM*! Biotch! Stupid fuck! Goddamn--goddamn blasphemer! You're a goddamn sinner! That's what the fuck you is. Motherfucker.
(Getting frustrated with a female caller) "Bitch, I'm flowin' straight from the survival scroll! Cut that bitch off! Next caller."
"Okay. Thank you. You gon' give me some help? You gon' help me by tellin' me I need help? Why don't you give me the line where I'm helped at the end of the . . . direct me upon the path, BEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTCH!!!!!!!!! [Gasps for air]. Shit. Oh monkey-minded ass nincomfuckingpoop!" (In response to the comment "Okay sir. You're an idiot. You need help. You need to go to the hospital. Call--" At this point, the bitch gets cut off).
"Muthafucka cause I'm God!!!" (In response to the question "Why so much cursin'?" by a female caller)
"Thought like this: Thought he farted, but the motherfucker cold shitted" (In response to the comment "I thought God wasn't human").
"IF!!!" (While interrupting the comment "I wanna know, if you God . . ." by a female caller named Tasha).
"Shut the fuck up, biotch! You stank. You stank to high heaven. You smell like [sniffs the air] . . . shit!" (responding to a caller who claimed to be "Gin Ra")
"And house niggas, bitch-made ass nincomfuckingpoops, uh, monkey-minded, afrocentric muh-fuckas--you wan' call me and tell me yo' opinion, but, uh, if you callin' and you seein' that I"m doin' something wrong . . . you love Jesus, then don't you love me enough to give me the correct route? Cause that's all I'm servin' yours. Shovin' it straight between yo' fuckin' eyes! You can't even real-ize!"
"I don't give a fuck what you think, bitch!"
"Well, bitch healing come by faith in me. . . . Bitch you gotta come and bow yo' goddamn knee to me and ask me what you want out of faith. If he be God [sarcastically]! Like, you know, they did in Matthew Verse 1. Like the devil did God. Why you come out and play the role of the devil? Cause I say I'm God? Cause-a you competitive, huh bitch? If ye be God turn this rock here into breadt [spelled with a t]! Muthafucka! I am God, bitch!" (In response to the comment "I want to know if you're going to heal all these diseases on this Earth" by a female caller named Janet)
"I know my scriptures. bitch!"
"(Reading from Bible) '...that make a man offended towards, and lay a snare...' You know, they try and trip a nigga up like me you know 'cause I ain't- I ain't followin' whitey's rules! You know..."
"I make my ass very available."
"The devil is a motherfuckin' liar. So you know I ain't worried, biotch! Stupid bitch."
"Your thoughts ain't my thoughts!"
"God Almighty! You know, ruler of heaven, and Earf [Earth], and every Goddamn thing in between!"
"It's gonna be goin' on like Donkey Kong: 144,000 strong."
"Because you nincom-fuckin'-poops don't know Jesus from Glory Halle-stupid, I will stick my sword in that ass so fast you would swear my name is Cupid!"
"Choose Christ, motherfucker."
"The 'erf ([Earth]) is my turf. That's a rap. That's a rap for yo' muthafuckin' ass."
"You will repent for your past, or rest your own motherfuckin' ass. What I'm sincerely trying to say is, check yo' self, motherfucka, 'fore you wreck yo' self."
(To a female caller who asks why he curses so much) "Motherfucker, 'cause I'm God!"
"Why you cursin', bitch?!"
"Fuck dat, I got dat glock locked back!"
"You trust in the devil, huh? Well if God sent the devil, in the name of Jesus by the power of the Holy Spirit, then motherfucker you fucked up, huh? You fucked up, huh, you know yo' ass is doomed!"
"You motherfuckers won't understand 'till I'm bringing some sharp-ass tempered steel around upon yo' goddamn neck. That's when you gonna understand me. Motherfucker."
"You motherfuckers telling me what I AM, AIN'T?! You don't know me! You never seen God! And I bet you steer clear of the bible 'cause white supremacists told you it ain't gonna help ya!"
"I come in the name of Jesus by the power of the Holy Spirit; any, anybody, anybody resistin' can goddamn my ass kissin'!"
"If you don't mind, God don't mind, playing yo' wicked ass at the end of time."
"You lucky the cops ain't around -- 'cause they the only motherfuckers who can't save your ass!" (laughs mockingly)
"I don't believe you. Why you ignorant motherfuckers keep callin' me? I'm lookin' for my 144,000 who know these scriptures, and not who think they believe. That's how they convicted O.J., they convicted O.J. with they think they believe. (Imitating jury) 'I think I believe O.J.--' Who gives a FUCK?! You ain't seen shit!"
(Getting frustrated with a caller) "Goddamn, every ignorant motherfuckin' house nigga in all the motherfuckin' South Central wanna call and fuck with the Lord."
(Begins to unbutton his shirt) "I gotta keep my motherfuckin' shirt on. Motherfucker. I can get naked for you assholes. Motherfucker, 'cause it's my world. And every motherfuckin' thing in it. That's including yo' asshole too."
"Motherfuckas...(as he takes off his shirt)...get naked for ya. So you motherfuckas can look in my asshole see if you find any sin. Stupid bitch....what you know about God?"
(After a caller claims he is not God) "BUT...I....AM!!!"
"Motherfucker I ain't no corrupt corru- communication came out mah mouf, you know what the corrup-corru-minication is? That's when you talk about the devil 'he the devil!' yo- yo motherfuckin' communications is corrupt. Whateva! Whateva 'den I'm wrong! You got me now! You got me now! You got me now oh you figured me out! You fuckin' nincom-fucking-poop. You figured me out! You got me red han'ed!"
"FUCK YO THOUGHTS! I'M GOD!!!...and bitch, you not" (To a caller saying he isn't God).
"What's on yo feeble ass mind?"
"What the fuck you doin' for God? You slang that pussy but it aint for God!"
"No way you'll never make it. Come wit the weak shit, I'll break it. Step into my zone-ass scriptures will stifle yo' punk ass!"
"God can't prove he God, huh? But it ain't for God to prove to you, it's for you to prove that you love God. Wrote a book, so you wouldn't forget what I want you to do, either. I require a dime out of every dollar . . . every dollar that you make. I require one dime. Here, turn this up. This to all you playa haters. (Proceeds to sing). Turn that head around. I'm finna take my shit back now. And you gettin' robbed! Wake up, wake up! Open the door. Lay that ass on the floor. I'm takin' back my shit--you gettin' robbed! You know I need my money. And you . . . you girl . . . should just ride wit me. Let's go along together. We'll be happy. Collecting back my money. Yeah!"

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